On Thursday, November 2, 2023 at 1:33:04 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Nov 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<3645b7e7-1fb4-4c1c...@googlegroups.com>):
>
> > > > > \So you say the ends justify the means??? A football coach needed a couple
> > > > > of new ends, so he went to a rival football
> > > > team and literally kidnapped two of them. He gave a statement to the press
> > > > that "the ends justify the means.” f he had the means he would not have
> > > > needed the ends
> > > I
> > \A mathematician was collecting statistics for a paper on the mean value of
> > different things , like the mean value of salaries in America , or the mean
> > value of stock market prices, and then his students stole all of those
> > statistics , so he had to start over, but this time he calculated the ends of
> > things , like when the universe would end or when the war in the Ukraine
> > would end, so then the mathematician's superior asked him for some
> > statistics, just any statistics and the mathematician replied:
> >
> > If I had the means, I would not have needed the ends.
> Perhaps if he used an end-oscope
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

(This joke is a little bit dated.)

Did you hear how the constipated mathematician solved his problem?

He worked it out with his slide rule.

On Nov 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<01eae4a0-6fe4-4577-9d25-d2725514991an@googlegroups.com>):

> > > \A mathematician was collecting statistics for a paper on the mean value of
> > > different things , like the mean value of salaries in America , or the mean
> > > value of stock market prices, and then his students stole all of those
> > > statistics , so he had to start over, but this time he calculated the ends
> > > of
> > > things , like when the universe would end or when the war in the Ukraine
> > > would end, so then the mathematician's superior asked him for some
> > > statistics, just any statistics and the mathematician replied:
> > >
> > > If I had the means, I would not have needed the ends.
> > Perhaps if he used an end-oscope
>
> (This joke is a little bit dated.)
>
> Did you hear how the constipated mathematician solved his problem?
>
> He worked it out with his slide rule.

Too much fiber in his diet.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

On Thursday, November 2, 2023 at 4:12:37 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Nov 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<01eae4a0-6fe4-4577...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > \A mathematician was collecting statistics for a paper on the mean value of
> > > > different things , like the mean value of salaries in America , or the mean
> > > > value of stock market prices, and then his students stole all of those
> > > > statistics , so he had to start over, but this time he calculated the ends
> > > > of
> > > > things , like when the universe would end or when the war in the Ukraine
> > > > would end, so then the mathematician's superior asked him for some
> > > > statistics, just any statistics and the mathematician replied:
> > > >
> > > > If I had the means, I would not have needed the ends.
> > > Perhaps if he used an end-oscope
> >
> > (This joke is a little bit dated.)
> >
> > Did you hear how the constipated mathematician solved his problem?
> >
> > He worked it out with his slide rule.
> Too much fiber in his diet.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

you mean he was such an asshole and took a 4' x 8' sheet of fiber board to work it out?

On Nov 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<c715084e-0463-45a0-b831-69fdc9533835n@googlegroups.com>):
If I had the means, I would not have needed the ends.
> > > > Perhaps if he used an end-oscope
> > >
> > > (This joke is a little bit dated.)
> > >
> > > Did you hear how the constipated mathematician solved his problem?
> > >
> > > He worked it out with his slide rule.
> > Too much fiber in his diet.
>
> you mean he was such an asshole and took a 4' x 8' sheet of fiber board to
> work it out?

For him --- Roto Rooter

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx