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interests / alt.humor.puns / Re: Any life here?

SubjectAuthor
* Any life here?William B. (Billby)
`* Re: Any life here?Mike
 `* Re: Any life here?William B. (Billby)
  `* Re: Any life here?Mike
   `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |   `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |     `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |       `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |         `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |           `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |            `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |             `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |               `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                 `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                   `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                    `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                     `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                      `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                       `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                        `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                         `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                          `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                           `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                            `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                             `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                                 `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                                    `* Re: Any life here?Mike
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        |                                       `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                        `* Re: Any life here?Mike
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        |                                                 `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                                                           `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                                                                        `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                         `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                          `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                           `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
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        |                                                                                 `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                                  `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                                   `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                                    `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                                     `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                                      `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                                       `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                                        `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        |                                                                                         `* Re: Any life here?Don Stockbauer
        |                                                                                          `* Re: Any life here?Mike
        `- Re: Any life here?Mike

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Re: Any life here?

<c0e0c099-3cbd-46eb-88f3-3126bbca2595n@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Tue, 12 Sep 2023 20:46 UTC

On Tuesday, September 12, 2023 at 1:44:53 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 12, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<7815d242-d048-48f8...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > her hotel, and of course she would come down for them I guess or she would
> > > > just ignore them and then when she came down, I would go up and introduce
> > > > myself and she would say something like "get out of my life you idiot "
> > > > I heard she came down with some kind of bad disease.
> > > You are contagious from a distance
> > Yes, I have perfected the technique of being contagious from a distance.. Why,
> > I can infect someone with AIDS over the Internet who lives in China. Once we
> > really expand in the space I'll be able to infect somebody with whooping
> > cough who lives on Beta Reticuli VII. It's just magnificent what I can do .
> > All bow down before me.
> You would make an infective weapon for us. just place you in the enemies
> country and wait.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

no, I would be an effective weapon against the United States, I would become Russia's dead hand.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB1CAE9000306C870000849138F@news.supernews.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
Newsgroups: alt.humor.puns
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 by: Mike - Wed, 13 Sep 2023 10:48 UTC

On Sep 12, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<c0e0c099-3cbd-46eb-88f3-3126bbca2595n@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > You are contagious from a distance
> > > Yes, I have perfected the technique of being contagious from a distance.
> > > Why,
> > > I can infect someone with AIDS over the Internet who lives in China. Once
> > > we
> > > really expand in the space I'll be able to infect somebody with whooping
> > > cough who lives on Beta Reticuli VII. It's just magnificent what I can do .
> > > All bow down before me.
> > You would make an infective weapon for us. just place you in the enemies
> > country and wait.
> no, I would be an effective weapon against the United States, I would become
> Russia's dead hand.

Now you are just putin us on.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Wed, 13 Sep 2023 14:22 UTC

On Wednesday, September 13, 2023 at 5:48:17 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 12, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<c0e0c099-3cbd-46eb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > You are contagious from a distance
> > > > Yes, I have perfected the technique of being contagious from a distance.
> > > > Why,
> > > > I can infect someone with AIDS over the Internet who lives in China.. Once
> > > > we
> > > > really expand in the space I'll be able to infect somebody with whooping
> > > > cough who lives on Beta Reticuli VII. It's just magnificent what I can do .
> > > > All bow down before me.
> > > You would make an infective weapon for us. just place you in the enemies
> > > country and wait.
> > no, I would be an effective weapon against the United States, I would become
> > Russia's dead hand.
> Now you are just putin us on.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

you mean like Putin on the Ritz
I have from time to time put on the Ritz,
glued the crackers all over my body

Re: Any life here?

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 by: Mike - Wed, 13 Sep 2023 14:54 UTC

On Sep 13, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<1d94349f-9580-40fa-aaf2-54c5c2b32e10n@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > You would make an infective weapon for us. just place you in the enemies
> > > > country and wait.
> > > no, I would be an effective weapon against the United States, I would
> > > become
> > > Russia's dead hand.
> > Now you are just putin us on.
> you mean like Putin on the Ritz
> I have from time to time put on the Ritz,
> glued the crackers all over my body

And get sued by the Ritz Brothers???

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<041e8886-8e88-49bd-91ae-c28a3ebfd9ddn@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Thu, 14 Sep 2023 05:12:44 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Thu, 14 Sep 2023 05:12 UTC

On Wednesday, September 13, 2023 at 9:54:39 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 13, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<1d94349f-9580-40fa...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > You would make an infective weapon for us. just place you in the enemies
> > > > > country and wait.
> > > > no, I would be an effective weapon against the United States, I would
> > > > become
> > > > Russia's dead hand.
> > > Now you are just putin us on.
> > you mean like Putin on the Ritz
> > I have from time to time put on the Ritz,
> > glued the crackers all over my body
> And get sued by the Ritz Brothers???
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Andy Griffith played the sheriff of Mayberry, a goody, two shoes type guy but then as he got older, they had him playing things like a sheriff that cannibalized people or whatever, and he also made commercials for the Ritz corporation , and his big line was "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz ". my favorite magazine the national lampoon did a take off on that , they had him say "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz and some things are a lot better if they have a Ritz stuck
way up in them, if you get my drift. "

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB2FFD700019D5170000594238F@news.supernews.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
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 by: Mike - Thu, 14 Sep 2023 08:46 UTC

On Sep 13, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<041e8886-8e88-49bd-91ae-c28a3ebfd9ddn@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > Now you are just putin us on.
> > > you mean like Putin on the Ritz
> > > I have from time to time put on the Ritz,
> > > glued the crackers all over my body
> > And get sued by the Ritz Brothers???
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> Andy Griffith played the sheriff of Mayberry, a goody, two shoes type guy but
> then as he got older, they had him playing things like a sheriff that
> cannibalized people or whatever, and he also made commercials for the Ritz
> corporation , and his big line was "everything's better when it sits on a
> Ritz ". my favorite magazine the national lampoon did a take off on that ,
> they had him say "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz and some things
> are a lot better if they have a Ritz stuck
> way up in them, if you get my drift. “

Now you have gone crackers.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<01016f65-9186-4a12-8ab9-d81a97a1c6b7n@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Thu, 14 Sep 2023 16:59:29 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Thu, 14 Sep 2023 16:59 UTC

On Thursday, September 14, 2023 at 3:46:27 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 13, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<041e8886-8e88-49bd...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > Now you are just putin us on.
> > > > you mean like Putin on the Ritz
> > > > I have from time to time put on the Ritz,
> > > > glued the crackers all over my body
> > > And get sued by the Ritz Brothers???
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > Andy Griffith played the sheriff of Mayberry, a goody, two shoes type guy but
> > then as he got older, they had him playing things like a sheriff that
> > cannibalized people or whatever, and he also made commercials for the Ritz
> > corporation , and his big line was "everything's better when it sits on a
> > Ritz ". my favorite magazine the national lampoon did a take off on that ,
> > they had him say "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz and some things
> > are a lot better if they have a Ritz stuck
> > way up in them, if you get my drift. “
>
> Now you have gone crackers.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Yes, I have gone crackers. What happens is I have a bunch of cracker boxes and the ones that still have crackers in them I title "Present crackers", but the empty boxes that need to be thrown away I label "Gone Crackers"

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB390FC000AF6FF70000F5F538F@news.supernews.com>

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 by: Mike - Thu, 14 Sep 2023 19:05 UTC

On Sep 14, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<01016f65-9186-4a12-8ab9-d81a97a1c6b7n@googlegroups.com>):

> > > Andy Griffith played the sheriff of Mayberry, a goody, two shoes type guy
> > > but
> > > then as he got older, they had him playing things like a sheriff that
> > > cannibalized people or whatever, and he also made commercials for the Ritz
> > > corporation , and his big line was "everything's better when it sits on a
> > > Ritz ". my favorite magazine the national lampoon did a take off on that ,
> > > they had him say "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz and some
> > > things
> > > are a lot better if they have a Ritz stuck
> > > way up in them, if you get my drift. “
> >
> > Now you have gone crackers.
> Yes, I have gone crackers. What happens is I have a bunch of cracker boxes
> and the ones that still have crackers in them I title "Present crackers", but
> the empty boxes that need to be thrown away I label "Gone Crackers”
Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<50e4b7db-b71f-4b89-ab5a-593a9970192cn@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Thu, 14 Sep 2023 20:16 UTC

On Thursday, September 14, 2023 at 2:05:44 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 14, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<01016f65-9186-4a12...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > Andy Griffith played the sheriff of Mayberry, a goody, two shoes type guy
> > > > but
> > > > then as he got older, they had him playing things like a sheriff that
> > > > cannibalized people or whatever, and he also made commercials for the Ritz
> > > > corporation , and his big line was "everything's better when it sits on a
> > > > Ritz ". my favorite magazine the national lampoon did a take off on that ,
> > > > they had him say "everything's better when it sits on a Ritz and some
> > > > things
> > > > are a lot better if they have a Ritz stuck
> > > > way up in them, if you get my drift. “
> > >
> > > Now you have gone crackers.
> > Yes, I have gone crackers. What happens is I have a bunch of cracker boxes
> > and the ones that still have crackers in them I title "Present crackers", but
> > the empty boxes that need to be thrown away I label "Gone Crackers”
> Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB441F300030B307000057F038F@news.supernews.com>

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 by: Mike - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 07:40 UTC

On Sep 14, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<50e4b7db-b71f-4b89-ab5a-593a9970192cn@googlegroups.com>):

> > > >
> > > > Now you have gone crackers.
> > > Yes, I have gone crackers. What happens is I have a bunch of cracker boxes
> > > and the ones that still have crackers in them I title "Present crackers",
> > > but
> > > the empty boxes that need to be thrown away I label "Gone Crackers”
> > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.

Now you have put your thumb on the problem.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<6158e327-597d-4374-a60e-de784e212aaen@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 12:42 UTC

On Friday, September 15, 2023 at 2:40:47 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 14, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<50e4b7db-b71f-4b89...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > >
> > > > > Now you have gone crackers.
> > > > Yes, I have gone crackers. What happens is I have a bunch of cracker boxes
> > > > and the ones that still have crackers in them I title "Present crackers",
> > > > but
> > > > the empty boxes that need to be thrown away I label "Gone Crackers”
> > > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> > I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> > carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.
> Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per year , but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my thumb on the scale and killed me.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB4AA7F000D055770000ED7138F@news.supernews.com>

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 by: Mike - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 15:06 UTC

On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<6158e327-597d-4374-a60e-de784e212aaen@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> > > I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> > > carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.
> > Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per year ,
> but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my thumb
> on the scale and killed me.

And how much were you charging for each dollar bill??

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<765b5069-4dbd-4550-aa20-9f11d73d089en@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Fri, 15 Sep 2023 17:39:09 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 17:39 UTC

On Friday, September 15, 2023 at 10:06:51 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<6158e327-597d-4374...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> > > > I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> > > > carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.
> > > Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> > I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per year ,
> > but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my thumb
> > on the scale and killed me.
> And how much were you charging for each dollar bill??
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Fifty cents.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB4F75B00160A137000098EA38F@news.supernews.com>

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 by: Mike - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 20:34 UTC

On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<765b5069-4dbd-4550-aa20-9f11d73d089en@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> > > > > I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> > > > > carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.
> > > > Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> > > I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per
> > > year ,
> > > but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my
> > > thumb
> > > on the scale and killed me.
> > And how much were you charging for each dollar bill?? Fifty cents.

I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<6bd1e6d4-f7d7-4f11-a478-4199384224fan@googlegroups.com>

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Date: Fri, 15 Sep 2023 14:01:52 -0700 (PDT)
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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Fri, 15 Sep 2023 21:01 UTC

On Friday, September 15, 2023 at 3:34:46 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<765b5069-4dbd-4550...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > Never the easy way for you, just have to take the hardtack
> > > > > > I was once a tack manufacturer, and one of my foremen didn't put enough
> > > > > > carbon in the steel so they wound up soft tacks.
> > > > > Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> > > > I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per
> > > > year ,
> > > > but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my
> > > > thumb
> > > > on the scale and killed me.
> > > And how much were you charging for each dollar bill?? Fifty cents.
>
> I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

knowing you, I thought you'd pay with three dollar bills.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB5A870000177A870000C25138F@news.supernews.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
Newsgroups: alt.humor.puns
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 by: Mike - Sat, 16 Sep 2023 09:10 UTC

On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<6bd1e6d4-f7d7-4f11-a478-4199384224fan@googlegroups.com>):
Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> > > > > I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per
> > > > > year ,
> > > > > but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my
> > > > > thumb
> > > > > on the scale and killed me.
> > > > And how much were you charging for each dollar bill?? Fifty cents.
> >
> > I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.
> knowing you, I thought you'd pay with three dollar bills.

Too bulky, I prefer large bills/

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<ee175493-0804-49a6-bb65-568b1b749516n@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Sun, 17 Sep 2023 13:19 UTC

On Saturday, September 16, 2023 at 4:10:19 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 15, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<6bd1e6d4-f7d7-4f11...@googlegroups.com>):
> Now you have put your thumb on the problem.
> > > > > > I was once a green grocer here and Victoria , sold millions of USD per
> > > > > > year ,
> > > > > > but one day this real thug came into the store and he saw that I had my
> > > > > > thumb
> > > > > > on the scale and killed me.
> > > > > And how much were you charging for each dollar bill?? Fifty cents..
> > >
> > > I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.
> > knowing you, I thought you'd pay with three dollar bills.
> Too bulky, I prefer large bills/
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Talking about larger bills , I remember a show way way back (this is an example of how my memory can remember tiny little details ) , in the show this fellow was kept in a mental hospital (I've never been in one, I don't think) even though he had no mental problems , it was just a mistake, him being kept in a mental hospital all those years there made him kind of retarded so he worked with his caseworker and she got him out into the public and he went into a diner and the waitress said "well that'll be $7.22 " and he paid with a 50 ,and she said "don't you have anything smaller " so he put the bills on his lap and looked at them closely. He told her "no , they're all the same size " He thought a smaller bill meant the bill was actually smaller in physical size. The reality is that all bills are exactly the same size and you can print stupid numbers on them supposedly making them worth more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary system, and how it will cause all of us to die.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB7584F00110125700000F9038F@news.supernews.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
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 by: Mike - Sun, 17 Sep 2023 15:52 UTC

On Sep 17, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<ee175493-0804-49a6-bb65-568b1b749516n@googlegroups.com>):
> > > >
> > > > I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.
> > > knowing you, I thought you'd pay with three dollar bills.
> > Too bulky, I prefer large bills/
>
> Talking about larger bills , I remember a show way way back (this is an
> example of how my memory can remember tiny little details ) , in the show
> this fellow was kept in a mental hospital (I've never been in one, I don't
> think) even though he had no mental problems , it was just a mistake, him
> being kept in a mental hospital all those years there made him kind of
> retarded so he worked with his caseworker and she got him out into the public
> and he went into a diner and the waitress said "well that'll be $7.22 " and
> he paid with a 50 ,and she said "don't you have anything smaller " so he put
> the bills on his lap and looked at them closely. He told her "no , they're
> all the same size " He thought a smaller bill meant the bill was actually
> smaller in physical size. The reality is that all bills are exactly the same
> size and you can print stupid numbers on them supposedly making them worth
> more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> system, and how it will cause all of us to die.

Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<17241bbe-0b98-44aa-bf12-3ee26154636bn@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Sun, 17 Sep 2023 23:36 UTC

On Sunday, September 17, 2023 at 10:52:59 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 17, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<ee175493-0804-49a6...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > >
> > > > > I buy $150 worth and will pay with a $75 bill.
> > > > knowing you, I thought you'd pay with three dollar bills.
> > > Too bulky, I prefer large bills/
> >
> > Talking about larger bills , I remember a show way way back (this is an
> > example of how my memory can remember tiny little details ) , in the show
> > this fellow was kept in a mental hospital (I've never been in one, I don't
> > think) even though he had no mental problems , it was just a mistake, him
> > being kept in a mental hospital all those years there made him kind of
> > retarded so he worked with his caseworker and she got him out into the public
> > and he went into a diner and the waitress said "well that'll be $7.22 " and
> > he paid with a 50 ,and she said "don't you have anything smaller " so he put
> > the bills on his lap and looked at them closely. He told her "no , they're
> > all the same size " He thought a smaller bill meant the bill was actually
> > smaller in physical size. The reality is that all bills are exactly the same
> > size and you can print stupid numbers on them supposedly making them worth
> > more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> > have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> > system, and how it will cause all of us to die.
> Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

OK. I'm thankful.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB849740002685270000D72F38F@news.supernews.com>

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Date: Mon, 18 Sep 2023 02:01:40 -0700
From: mlevines...@redshift.com (Mike)
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Subject: Re: Any life here?
Newsgroups: alt.humor.puns
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 by: Mike - Mon, 18 Sep 2023 09:01 UTC

On Sep 17, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<17241bbe-0b98-44aa-bf12-3ee26154636bn@googlegroups.com>):

> > >
> > > Talking about larger bills , I remember a show way way back (this is an
> > > example of how my memory can remember tiny little details ) , in the show
> > > this fellow was kept in a mental hospital (I've never been in one, I don't
> > > think) even though he had no mental problems , it was just a mistake, him
> > > being kept in a mental hospital all those years there made him kind of
> > > retarded so he worked with his caseworker and she got him out into the
> > > public
> > > and he went into a diner and the waitress said "well that'll be $7.22 " and
> > > he paid with a 50 ,and she said "don't you have anything smaller " so he
> > > put
> > > the bills on his lap and looked at them closely. He told her "no , they're
> > > all the same size " He thought a smaller bill meant the bill was actually
> > > smaller in physical size. The reality is that all bills are exactly the
> > > same
> > > size and you can print stupid numbers on them supposedly making them worth
> > > more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> > > have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> > > system, and how it will cause all of us to die.
> > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> OK. I'm thankful.

But not pence - ive.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<8e4776a3-ea79-477a-977c-ab691b97e08en@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Mon, 18 Sep 2023 18:06:46 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Mon, 18 Sep 2023 18:06 UTC

On Monday, September 18, 2023 at 4:01:51 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 17, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<17241bbe-0b98-44aa...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > >
> > > > Talking about larger bills , I remember a show way way back (this is an
> > > > example of how my memory can remember tiny little details ) , in the show
> > > > this fellow was kept in a mental hospital (I've never been in one, I don't
> > > > think) even though he had no mental problems , it was just a mistake, him
> > > > being kept in a mental hospital all those years there made him kind of
> > > > retarded so he worked with his caseworker and she got him out into the
> > > > public
> > > > and he went into a diner and the waitress said "well that'll be $7.22 " and
> > > > he paid with a 50 ,and she said "don't you have anything smaller " so he
> > > > put
> > > > the bills on his lap and looked at them closely. He told her "no , they're
> > > > all the same size " He thought a smaller bill meant the bill was actually
> > > > smaller in physical size. The reality is that all bills are exactly the
> > > > same
> > > > size and you can print stupid numbers on them supposedly making them worth
> > > > more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> > > > have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> > > > system, and how it will cause all of us to die.
> > > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> > OK. I'm thankful.
>
> But not pence - ive.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

I'm going to pound you to a pulp.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2AB988830002125870000A3F438F@news.supernews.com>

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From: mlevines...@redshift.com (Mike)
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Subject: Re: Any life here?
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 by: Mike - Tue, 19 Sep 2023 07:42 UTC

On Sep 18, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<8e4776a3-ea79-477a-977c-ab691b97e08en@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > > more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> > > > > have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> > > > > system, and how it will cause all of us to die.
> > > > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> > > OK. I'm thankful.
> >
> > But not pence - ive.
> I'm going to pound you to a pulp.

I am not going to be a guinea pig for your delusions

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<675b83ad-5c42-4df8-84a4-6e4fb24dd5ean@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Tue, 19 Sep 2023 20:41:15 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Tue, 19 Sep 2023 20:41 UTC

On Tuesday, September 19, 2023 at 2:43:10 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 18, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<8e4776a3-ea79-477a...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > more or less, like one bill might have a one printed on it, another might
> > > > > > have 1000 on it , which just shows the arbitrary nature of our monetary
> > > > > > system, and how it will cause all of us to die.
> > > > > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> > > > OK. I'm thankful.
> > >
> > > But not pence - ive.
> > I'm going to pound you to a pulp.
> I am not going to be a guinea pig for your delusions
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

There is a word very similar to ha penny which describes you : a ha wit.

Re: Any life here?

<0001HW.2ABAEE3C00026ACA70000140C38F@news.supernews.com>

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 by: Mike - Wed, 20 Sep 2023 09:09 UTC

On Sep 19, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<675b83ad-5c42-4df8-84a4-6e4fb24dd5ean@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > > > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> > > > > OK. I'm thankful.
> > > >
> > > > But not pence - ive.
> > > I'm going to pound you to a pulp.
> > I am not going to be a guinea pig for your delusions There is a word very similar to ha penny which describes you : a ha wit.

But I do not do things half way.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Any life here?

<ffef04cb-fcbf-4345-b544-1b4ddb082faan@googlegroups.com>

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<0001HW.2AB4F75B00160A137000098EA38F@news.supernews.com> <6bd1e6d4-f7d7-4f11-a478-4199384224fan@googlegroups.com>
<0001HW.2AB5A870000177A870000C25138F@news.supernews.com> <ee175493-0804-49a6-bb65-568b1b749516n@googlegroups.com>
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Subject: Re: Any life here?
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
Injection-Date: Wed, 20 Sep 2023 18:08:55 +0000
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Wed, 20 Sep 2023 18:08 UTC

On Wednesday, September 20, 2023 at 4:09:29 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Sep 19, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<675b83ad-5c42-4df8...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > Just be glad you did not live in pre-decimal England.
> > > > > > OK. I'm thankful.
> > > > >
> > > > > But not pence - ive.
> > > > I'm going to pound you to a pulp.
> > > I am not going to be a guinea pig for your delusions There is a word very similar to ha penny which describes you : a ha wit.
>
> But I do not do things half way.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

But that's the type of house you escaped from.


interests / alt.humor.puns / Re: Any life here?

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