On 10/29/2021 5:11 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
>
>> Try to die in a funny way so you can chuckle for eternity.
>
>
> I can't think of a funny way to die unless someone else is doing the dying. And I'm sure the reverse applies as well. Chuckle for Eternity - lol, sounds like some kind of motto, or maybe a poem title. But we all know that humor is subjective, or so they say. So what's funny for others may not be funny for me, especially if it concerns my death. Lots of funny ways to die out there. Unexpected exits. Weird shit. Funny for sure. Funny for all, except for the person who is dying. Now of course it's possible that once we die, that which continues to live within our or without our rotting shells has been elevated to a highly advanced level of inner knowledge, to a place where pain can be your only companion with others laughing at you because of it, yet you in your elevated state able to see the humor in it as well, even through the pain, and to chuckle along with the living who laugh at you from above. To not only laugh but to chuckle in a super duper relaxed way that is a constant eternal chant born of and involving all advanced chakras above and beyond the stinking grave.
>
> Laugh Corpse Laugh
>
A funny way to die is being in a hot air balloon and getting struck by
lightning. If I'm reading my morning newspaper and come across an
article like that, I'll probably shit my bloomers. I remember once
meeting a friend of Bubbe's who told me her brother who was in the Navy
had died during WWII. It seems he was painting the ship, fell and broke
his neck. I couldn't help but spontaneously break out in laughter, and
of course I shit my boxers. I might have been able to hide it but when
turds started rolling my legs, the gig was up. I wanted to die; which
would have also been a funny way to go.

On Friday, October 29, 2021 at 11:40:00 PM UTC-4, Judith Latham wrote:
> On 10/29/2021 5:11 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
> >
> >> Try to die in a funny way so you can chuckle for eternity.
> >
> >
> > I can't think of a funny way to die unless someone else is doing the dying. And I'm sure the reverse applies as well. Chuckle for Eternity - lol, sounds like some kind of motto, or maybe a poem title. But we all know that humor is subjective, or so they say. So what's funny for others may not be funny for me, especially if it concerns my death. Lots of funny ways to die out there. Unexpected exits. Weird shit. Funny for sure. Funny for all, except for the person who is dying. Now of course it's possible that once we die, that which continues to live within our or without our rotting shells has been elevated to a highly advanced level of inner knowledge, to a place where pain can be your only companion with others laughing at you because of it, yet you in your elevated state able to see the humor in it as well, even through the pain, and to chuckle along with the living who laugh at you from above. To not only laugh but to chuckle in a super duper relaxed way that is a constant eternal chant born of and involving all advanced chakras above and beyond the stinking grave.
> >
> > Laugh Corpse Laugh
> >
> A funny way to die is being in a hot air balloon and getting struck by
> lightning. If I'm reading my morning newspaper and come across an
> article like that, I'll probably shit my bloomers. I remember once
> meeting a friend of Bubbe's who told me her brother who was in the Navy
> had died during WWII. It seems he was painting the ship, fell and broke
> his neck. I couldn't help but spontaneously break out in laughter, and
> of course I shit my boxers. I might have been able to hide it but when
> turds started rolling my legs, the gig was up. I wanted to die; which
> would have also been a funny way to go.

People who ride in those are already dead to me.

> I have almost died in a funny way - or at least stupid way. I was setting off bug bombs in my house and I was placing one under a counter and I stood up and hit my head almost becoming unconcious. I was alone in the house. If I had been knocked out I would have been next to a bug bomb spewing its poison in my face. That is not a way I want to be remembered. Or is it?

Worse yet, they list it as a suicide. Ah yes, as we have mentioned and as we know, every day we have no idea how many bullets we dodge. We get lucky millions of times, but we die only once. Maybe that's lucky too. Who knows? I mean who the fuck knows, man?

> People who ride in those are already dead to me.

I knew a girl who took a parachute ride with an instructor. She liked to go around saying, "Why not live? Why be afraid of dying?" I think she was a posier. I think people who go up in those balloons are afraid of death more than the average person. They go up once. If they live they can brag about it the rest of their lives. Tell other people not to hold back - to "Live life to it's fullest. Come on man, stop being afraid", when in reality they are the biggest scaredy cats of all. The half open chute is a good one. Opened just enough to give the rider hope. A bit of fluttering but coming down fast, too fast. Still there is hope. Even if the chute comes all the way off you can always hope for a sturdy yet yielding tree loaded with soft branches to cushion your landing.

On 10/31/2021 9:05 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
>
>> People who ride in those are already dead to me.
>
> I knew a girl who took a parachute ride with an instructor. She liked to go around saying, "Why not live? Why be afraid of dying?" I think she was a posier. I think people who go up in those balloons are afraid of death more than the average person. They go up once. If they live they can brag about it the rest of their lives. Tell other people not to hold back - to "Live life to it's fullest. Come on man, stop being afraid", when in reality they are the biggest scaredy cats of all. The half open chute is a good one. Opened just enough to give the rider hope. A bit of fluttering but coming down fast, too fast. Still there is hope. Even if the chute comes all the way off you can always hope for a sturdy yet yielding tree loaded with soft branches to cushion your landing.
>

What would make for great television, and requires expert camera work,
is having people parachute from 20,000 feet and then have both chords
malfunction. The look on their faces would be priceless. Someone in the
entertainment industry should hire me.

On Sunday, October 31, 2021 at 11:07:29 PM UTC-4, Judith Latham wrote:
> On 10/31/2021 9:05 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
> >
> >> People who ride in those are already dead to me.
> >
> > I knew a girl who took a parachute ride with an instructor. She liked to go around saying, "Why not live? Why be afraid of dying?" I think she was a posier. I think people who go up in those balloons are afraid of death more than the average person. They go up once. If they live they can brag about it the rest of their lives. Tell other people not to hold back - to "Live life to it's fullest. Come on man, stop being afraid", when in reality they are the biggest scaredy cats of all. The half open chute is a good one. Opened just enough to give the rider hope. A bit of fluttering but coming down fast, too fast. Still there is hope. Even if the chute comes all the way off you can always hope for a sturdy yet yielding tree loaded with soft branches to cushion your landing.
> >
> What would make for great television, and requires expert camera work,
> is having people parachute from 20,000 feet and then have both chords
> malfunction. The look on their faces would be priceless. Someone in the
> entertainment industry should hire me.

My hard fast rule is to avoid any activity based on emergency equipment.

Ollie wrote:
Judith wrote:

> My hard fast rule is to avoid any activity based on emergency equipment.

> What would make for great television, and requires expert camera work,
> is having people parachute from 20,000 feet and then have both chords
> malfunction. The look on their faces would be priceless. Someone in the
> entertainment industry should hire me.

Good comments from both you clowns here. I also avoid activities requiring emergency equipment, especially the kind that doesn't work. In fact, I tend to avoid activities altogether.

How about not just a backup chute but also a bungee cord long attached to your ankles and anchored to the plane 4 miles above. If all systems fail you're not going to hit the ground anyway. But for a while it's going to look like it. That's good enough. A good scare is better than dying. Being alive to tell everyone, "Oh man, you shoulda seen it, it was wild - you shoulda been there, man", and so forth. But then with Judith's face cam proposal we don't need the survivor's account anyway. I think the swift descent shots would be more entertaining done silent as opposed to with sound, especially with an advanced camera set up. Lots of different angles and up close shots. We want to see that face!

On Monday, November 1, 2021 at 8:50:20 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> Ollie wrote:
> Judith wrote:
>
> > My hard fast rule is to avoid any activity based on emergency equipment..
> > What would make for great television, and requires expert camera work,
> > is having people parachute from 20,000 feet and then have both chords
> > malfunction. The look on their faces would be priceless. Someone in the
> > entertainment industry should hire me.
> Good comments from both you clowns here. I also avoid activities requiring emergency equipment, especially the kind that doesn't work. In fact, I tend to avoid activities altogether.
>
> How about not just a backup chute but also a bungee cord long attached to your ankles and anchored to the plane 4 miles above. If all systems fail you're not going to hit the ground anyway. But for a while it's going to look like it. That's good enough. A good scare is better than dying. Being alive to tell everyone, "Oh man, you shoulda seen it, it was wild - you shoulda been there, man", and so forth. But then with Judith's face cam proposal we don't need the survivor's account anyway. I think the swift descent shots would be more entertaining done silent as opposed to with sound, especially with an advanced camera set up. Lots of different angles and up close shots. We want to see that face!

The bungee cord holds but your feet are ripped apart from the cord.

> The bungee cord holds but your feet are ripped apart from the cord.

Like a seatbelt straight through the waist. Good visual. Funny, no matter how many safety measures one takes it's always one too few. For example, a guy could strap 10 bungee cords to 10 different parts of his body figuring they can't all fail, and they don't - but the high bridge fixture to which they're attached comes free from the pressure. Reminds me of a single frame cartoon I thought of a few years back. A guy is standing on a huge rock high up on a cliff telling his friend above, "Wow, these hiking shoes are great - the lug soles, the grip - I mean they're sticking to everything, no sliding at all", and as he's saying this the entire block of rock he's standing on is coming loose. It's like God showing up at your bed and telling you you're going to die tomorrow and it won't be a heart attack or anything natural that way - it will be some kind of intrusion - so you go out of your way to avoid doing anything. Then you find yourself needing something from the store only a block away. You walk very carefully, very guarded, looking in all directions before making any kind of move. Everything is going well. You need to step out into the street to cross it. You look both ways and see nothing coming for blocks on end. The path is all clear. You step out off the curb and suddenly a phantom car plows into you and slams you steam-roller style into a shallow urban grave. When the Big Man says it's time to go, you're going to go.

And that time is............................soon enough

On Tuesday, November 2, 2021 at 5:54:19 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > The bungee cord holds but your feet are ripped apart from the cord.
> Like a seatbelt straight through the waist. Good visual. Funny, no matter how many safety measures one takes it's always one too few. For example, a guy could strap 10 bungee cords to 10 different parts of his body figuring they can't all fail, and they don't - but the high bridge fixture to which they're attached comes free from the pressure. Reminds me of a single frame cartoon I thought of a few years back. A guy is standing on a huge rock high up on a cliff telling his friend above, "Wow, these hiking shoes are great - the lug soles, the grip - I mean they're sticking to everything, no sliding at all", and as he's saying this the entire block of rock he's standing on is coming loose. It's like God showing up at your bed and telling you you're going to die tomorrow and it won't be a heart attack or anything natural that way - it will be some kind of intrusion - so you go out of your way to avoid doing anything. Then you find yourself needing something from the store only a block away. You walk very carefully, very guarded, looking in all directions before making any kind of move. Everything is going well. You need to step out into the street to cross it. You look both ways and see nothing coming for blocks on end. The path is all clear. You step out off the curb andisuddenly a phantom car plows into you and slams you steam-roller style into a shallow urban grave. When the Big Man says it's time to go, you're going to go.
>
> And that time is............................soon enough

The doctor is dictating the cause of death and everyone starts laughing. They the all die laughing. Is this funny? No. It is tragic. This is why all deaths are now from COVID.

> The doctor is dictating the cause of death and everyone starts laughing. They the all die laughing. Is this funny? No. It is tragic. This is why all deaths are now from COVID.

It took a long time - and I'm not saying I'm one hundred percent free of it just yet - before I basically stopped reading all COVID related news articles. It has to be something really special to rope me in. Sometimes I will get roped in - even before COVID came along - by a good headline with a non existent story. Or heavily formalized shit. The information is worthless. I suppose it was from the start. I still wear the mask. Carry a cheapie in my pocket and use in establishments even if they say it's ok not to. Just a habit, like locking your car door no matter what. They say now the deaths are skyrocketing, and it's always somebody who hasn't had the vaccine who dies, and some are recorded in their final moments just before death, or after pulling through the illness miraculously, urging others to not foolishly put off getting the shot like they did. This reminds me of voters who every four years tell people, "Don't make the same mistake I did 4 years ago - don't vote for him again",

I am rooting for more Stimulus checks no matter how many people have to die to make it happen.

On 11/3/2021 8:44 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
> I am rooting for more Stimulus checks no matter how many people have to die to make it happen.
>

Those days of free money are gone forever. Even at your advanced age,
you gotta get of your ass and do something. Make a movie, rob a bank,
collect cans, etc... I'm going to make my fortune by playing the
lottery. I know a fortune teller who promised to tell me the winning
numbers.

KEEP DRINKING ADRENOCHROME AND YOU WILL LIVE FOREVER.
BOZO DE NIRO SATAN KIKE'S OWN RABBI OF COURSE CHEWED ON
HIS FORESKIN AS A CHILD, SWALLOWED THE "brie" FORESKIN, AND
OF COURSE SLURPED SUCKED PLENTY OF BLOOD FROM SMILKSTEIN'S
NEMESIS JOSE SCOTT'S BABY PENIS . . .

BOZO DE NIRO HAS ALWAYS BEEN A GAY BOY JEW, FROM INFANCY.
HE CLAIMS THAT OTHERS ARE SUCH, BECAUSE HE FEELS SHAME WHAT
HAPPENED WITH HIM AND HIS OWN RABBI.

THE BIG QUESTION IS THIS: ARE THE RABBI'S BITE MARKS / SCARS
STILL VISIBLE ON BOZO DE
NIRO'S PENIS ?

DIDN'T YOU HAVE SAY THAT YOU HAD AN INTIMATE AFFAIR WITH
BOZO DE NIRO, MR. JOSEPH ?
LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON'S WEIRD PENIS, PLEASE TELL US HOW TINY
AND MANGLED AND SHREDDED BOZO SMILKSTEIN'S PENIS IS.

HAVE YOU HAD AN A.I.D.S. TEST MR. JOSEPH ?
BECAUSE THAT KHAZARIAN ASIAN RODENT KIKE COLLECTS DISEASES
LIKE HE COLLECTS OLD PORN MAGAZINES . . .

"Thomas Joseph" wrote in message
news:44cb24c3-33c1-42b9-b57c-da7a642fec4an@googlegroups.com...

=
> > "So it can die again, you fucking idiot. Don't you know that death is a
> > revolving door?"
> Death is a sure thing. You can bet your life on it. Many do everyday. Roll
> the dice. Spin the wheel. Take the shot.

Yes, bet on death - you can't lose. Or so it seems. Sure, you'll die but
you won't be able to spend the money you won with the bet. You'll come back
as someone or something else, struggling from day one to learn all over
again the survival methods you learned last time, and the time before that,
and the time before that, all the way back to the beginning of time when the
world was born and you were there ameba style.

On Thursday, November 4, 2021 at 12:52:43 AM UTC-4, Ras Tafarian wrote:
> KEEP DRINKING ADRENOCHROME AND YOU WILL LIVE FOREVER.
> BOZO DE NIRO SATAN KIKE'S OWN RABBI OF COURSE CHEWED ON
> HIS FORESKIN AS A CHILD, SWALLOWED THE "brie" FORESKIN, AND
> OF COURSE SLURPED SUCKED PLENTY OF BLOOD FROM SMILKSTEIN'S
> NEMESIS JOSE SCOTT'S BABY PENIS . . .
>
> BOZO DE NIRO HAS ALWAYS BEEN A GAY BOY JEW, FROM INFANCY.
> HE CLAIMS THAT OTHERS ARE SUCH, BECAUSE HE FEELS SHAME WHAT
> HAPPENED WITH HIM AND HIS OWN RABBI.
>
> THE BIG QUESTION IS THIS: ARE THE RABBI'S BITE MARKS / SCARS
> STILL VISIBLE ON BOZO DE
> NIRO'S PENIS ?
>
> DIDN'T YOU HAVE SAY THAT YOU HAD AN INTIMATE AFFAIR WITH
> BOZO DE NIRO, MR. JOSEPH ?
> LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON'S WEIRD PENIS, PLEASE TELL US HOW TINY
> AND MANGLED AND SHREDDED BOZO SMILKSTEIN'S PENIS IS.
>
> HAVE YOU HAD AN A.I.D.S. TEST MR. JOSEPH ?
> BECAUSE THAT KHAZARIAN ASIAN RODENT KIKE COLLECTS DISEASES
> LIKE HE COLLECTS OLD PORN MAGAZINES . . .
>
>
> "Thomas Joseph" wrote in message
> news:44cb24c3-33c1-42b9...@googlegroups.com...
> =
> > > "So it can die again, you fucking idiot. Don't you know that death is a
> > > revolving door?"
> > Death is a sure thing. You can bet your life on it. Many do everyday. Roll
> > the dice. Spin the wheel. Take the shot.
>
>
> Yes, bet on death - you can't lose. Or so it seems. Sure, you'll die but
> you won't be able to spend the money you won with the bet. You'll come back
> as someone or something else, struggling from day one to learn all over
> again the survival methods you learned last time, and the time before that,
> and the time before that, all the way back to the beginning of time when the
> world was born and you were there ameba style.

Ras is making a lot of sense

On Thursday, November 4, 2021 at 12:52:43 AM UTC-4, Ras Tafarian wrote:
> KEEP DRINKING ADRENOCHROME AND YOU WILL LIVE FOREVER.
> BOZO DE NIRO SATAN KIKE'S OWN RABBI OF COURSE CHEWED ON
> HIS FORESKIN AS A CHILD, SWALLOWED THE "brie" FORESKIN, AND
> OF COURSE SLURPED SUCKED PLENTY OF BLOOD FROM SMILKSTEIN'S
> NEMESIS JOSE SCOTT'S BABY PENIS . . .
>
> BOZO DE NIRO HAS ALWAYS BEEN A GAY BOY JEW, FROM INFANCY.
> HE CLAIMS THAT OTHERS ARE SUCH, BECAUSE HE FEELS SHAME WHAT
> HAPPENED WITH HIM AND HIS OWN RABBI.
>
> THE BIG QUESTION IS THIS: ARE THE RABBI'S BITE MARKS / SCARS
> STILL VISIBLE ON BOZO DE
> NIRO'S PENIS ?
>
> DIDN'T YOU HAVE SAY THAT YOU HAD AN INTIMATE AFFAIR WITH
> BOZO DE NIRO, MR. JOSEPH ?
> LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON'S WEIRD PENIS, PLEASE TELL US HOW TINY
> AND MANGLED AND SHREDDED BOZO SMILKSTEIN'S PENIS IS.
>
> HAVE YOU HAD AN A.I.D.S. TEST MR. JOSEPH ?
> BECAUSE THAT KHAZARIAN ASIAN RODENT KIKE COLLECTS DISEASES
> LIKE HE COLLECTS OLD PORN MAGAZINES . . .

This is a newsgroup Ras. Although I am probably the most honest person on earth I do not consider the newsgroup an official part of earth. I know it's grounded to the earth, but it's not the same thing. I can say anything I want on here and it doesn't have to be the truth, although mostly I honor it. So when I say I sucked Bozo's cock that doesn't mean it actually happened. I did suck his asshole though. Whew, a really foul one.

> Ras is making a lot of sense

And you by seeing it are making even more sense. And I by seeing yours am making even more. That's the way it works. It builds. It moves. Making sense is a good thing. It's a good contagious disease that unfortunately so far has not infected enough people. But with work we can make it happen, make sense of it all in this crazy mixed up world that doesn't amount to a hill of beans.

On Wednesday, November 3, 2021 at 10:52:43 PM UTC-4, Judith Latham wrote:

> Those days of free money are gone forever. Even at your advanced age,
> you gotta get of your ass and do something. Make a movie, rob a bank,
> collect cans, etc... I'm going to make my fortune by playing the
> lottery. I know a fortune teller who promised to tell me the winning
> numbers.

Judith, I am living on $793 a month age-related SSI from the government. I feel richer than ever in my life. When I worked I didn't make much more than what I'm getting now - my own doing, because I worked for the weekend all my life - and I don't even have to work for it. Sure, I'm a ward of the state and I have to stay on my toes, make sure I don't slip up and forget to fill out forms properly and so forth. Had this been offered to me when I was 30 years old, even with the proviso that I never attempt in any way to turn it into something more, I would have taken it even then. I am a good worker. I just never liked holding jobs. And I held my share. It's really funny but it's true. I openly hated work more than anyone I ever knew, yet I was also the best worker I ever knew.

On Saturday, November 6, 2021 at 2:56:06 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> On Wednesday, November 3, 2021 at 10:52:43 PM UTC-4, Judith Latham wrote:
>
> > Those days of free money are gone forever. Even at your advanced age,
> > you gotta get of your ass and do something. Make a movie, rob a bank,
> > collect cans, etc... I'm going to make my fortune by playing the
> > lottery. I know a fortune teller who promised to tell me the winning
> > numbers.
> Judith, I am living on $793 a month age-related SSI from the government. I feel richer than ever in my life. When I worked I didn't make much more than what I'm getting now - my own doing, because I worked for the weekend all my life - and I don't even have to work for it. Sure, I'm a ward of the state and I have to stay on my toes, make sure I don't slip up and forget to fill out forms properly and so forth. Had this been offered to me when I was 30 years old, even with the proviso that I never attempt in any way to turn it into something more, I would have taken it even then. I am a good worker. I just never liked holding jobs. And I held my share. It's really funny but it's true. I openly hated work more than anyone I ever knew, yet I was also the best worker I ever knew.

I hated work. Even the best job was a pain. I am grateful I survivrd the work grind and I know I could have had it bad.

> I hated work. Even the best job was a pain. I am grateful I survivrd the work grind and I know I could have had it bad.

I feel the same. Even without knowing it, or maybe knowing it intuitively, my plans (or lack of them) brought me to a place of contentment of sorts. I would not trade a single moment of my life for anything, afraid that one tiny trade might unravel the tidy ball of twine that has thus far kept my life together.

On Saturday, November 6, 2021 at 9:46:01 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I hated work. Even the best job was a pain. I am grateful I survivrd the work grind and I know I could have had it bad.
> I feel the same. Even without knowing it, or maybe knowing it intuitively, my plans (or lack of them) brought me to a place of contentment of sorts. I would not trade a single moment of my life for anything, afraid that one tiny trade might unravel the tidy ball of twine that has thus far kept my life together.

If you want a different life start now.

> If you want a different life start now.

How do you start doing things?

On 11/9/2021 2:20 AM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
>
>> If you want a different life start now.
>
>
> How do you start doing things?
>

Do what I'm doing. After that midget stood me up at JFK I've been
determined to change my life completely. As you know, first on my agenda
is my weight. So far, so good. I've been doing my Richard Simmons
workout faithfully every day and am proud to say I'm down to 438 lbs.
Next I will work on my career and last my personal relationships. I'm
changing my life Thomas, and so can you. If you think you might like to
try an Orthodox lifestyle, I can connect you with all the right rabbis.

> Do what I'm doing. After that midget stood me up at JFK I've been
> determined to change my life completely. As you know, first on my agenda
> is my weight. So far, so good. I've been doing my Richard Simmons
> workout faithfully every day and am proud to say I'm down to 438 lbs.
> Next I will work on my career and last my personal relationships. I'm
> changing my life Thomas, and so can you. If you think you might like to
> try an Orthodox lifestyle, I can connect you with all the right rabbis.

I have already done all the changing I'm going to do. Years ago I made a big change. Went out and got a job, starting making my own food, jogging, then walking after I recuperated from allergy related asthma. It was a big change. Part of the big change was my vow to one day get to the point where I never have to change again. And that point is now. I am opposed to change. Not for everyone. Just for myself.

What, me change?