novaBBS - alt.humor.puns - Re: Adam and Eve

> On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma, my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > >
> > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > >
> > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > >
> > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in the
> > > > > center
> > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives scattered
> > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will on a
> > > > > total
> > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > that.
> > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > >
> > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > Groucho Marx
> > >
> > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > would
> > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which is a
> > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is hairy. we
> were real cut ups.

Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
“season”??
Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs all
pointing in the wrong direction.
Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma, my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in the
> > > > > > center
> > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives scattered
> > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will on a
> > > > > > total
> > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > > that.
> > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > >
> > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > >
> > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > > would
> > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which is a
> > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is hairy. we
> > were real cut ups.
>
> Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> “season”??
> Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs all
> pointing in the wrong direction.
> Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman because she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered thousands of times.
I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.

On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b-824f-4407251668a1n@googlegroups.com>):

> On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in the
> > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives scattered
> > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will on a
> > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > > > that.
> > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > >
> > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > > > would
> > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which is a
> > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > >
> > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > Groucho Marx
> > >
> > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is hairy.
> > > we
> > > were real cut ups.
> >
> > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > “season”??
> > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs all
> > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman because
> she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered thousands
> of times.
> I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.

And you are just the man to do it just because.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Click here to read the complete article

On Sunday, April 2, 2023 at 3:16:36 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in the
> > > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives scattered
> > > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will on a
> > > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > > > > that.
> > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > > > > would
> > > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which is a
> > > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > >
> > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > >
> > > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> > > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is hairy.
> > > > we
> > > > were real cut ups.
> > >
> > > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > > “season”??
> > > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs all
> > > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman because
> > she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> > pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered thousands
> > of times.
> > I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.
> And you are just the man to do it just because.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Click here to read the complete article

On Apr 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<1e1d5220-84ea-429b-a697-8081fe60bbd4n@googlegroups.com>):

> On Sunday, April 2, 2023 at 3:16:36 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in
> > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives
> > > > > > > > > scattered
> > > > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will
> > > > > > > > > on a
> > > > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > > > > > that.
> > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > > > > > would
> > > > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which
> > > > > > > is a
> > > > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > >
> > > > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> > > > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is
> > > > > hairy.
> > > > > we
> > > > > were real cut ups.
> > > >
> > > > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > > > “season”??
> > > > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs
> > > > all
> > > > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > > > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > >
> > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > Groucho Marx
> > >
> > > Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman
> > > because
> > > she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> > > pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered thousands
> > > of times.
> > > I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.
> > And you are just the man to do it just because.
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> That last post was unbelievably embarrassing. I only have one of two possible
> explanations for it:
>
> I was really drunk at the time, or two:
>
> My niece Felicity has yet again stolen my password, and those words are hers.

Click here to read the complete article

On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 3:44:37 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Apr 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<1e1d5220-84ea-429b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Sunday, April 2, 2023 at 3:16:36 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that sells
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in
> > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives
> > > > > > > > > > scattered
> > > > > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will
> > > > > > > > > > on a
> > > > > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking like
> > > > > > > > > that.
> > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them hands
> > > > > > > > would
> > > > > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which
> > > > > > > > is a
> > > > > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > >
> > > > > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means just
> > > > > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is
> > > > > > hairy.
> > > > > > we
> > > > > > were real cut ups.
> > > > >
> > > > > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > > > > “season”??
> > > > > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs
> > > > > all
> > > > > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > > > > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > >
> > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > >
> > > > Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman
> > > > because
> > > > she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> > > > pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered thousands
> > > > of times.
> > > > I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.
> > > And you are just the man to do it just because.
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > That last post was unbelievably embarrassing. I only have one of two possible
> > explanations for it:
> >
> > I was really drunk at the time, or two:
> >
> > My niece Felicity has yet again stolen my password, and those words are hers.
> Or both???
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Click here to read the complete article

Re: Adam and Eve

<0001HW.29DB2635000B571D70000716038F@news.supernews.com>

copy mid

https://www.novabbs.com/interests/article-flat.php?id=19377&group=alt.humor.puns#19377

copy link Newsgroups: alt.humor.puns

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Date: Mon, 03 Apr 2023 08:20:21 -0700
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Subject: Re: Adam and Eve
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by: Mike - Mon, 3 Apr 2023 15:20 UTC

On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592-99b1-6462a2031f0cn@googlegroups.com>):

> On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 3:44:37 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Apr 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<1e1d5220-84ea-429b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > On Sunday, April 2, 2023 at 3:16:36 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > (in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > sells
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in
> > > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives
> > > > > > > > > > > scattered
> > > > > > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will
> > > > > > > > > > > on a
> > > > > > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking
> > > > > > > > > > like
> > > > > > > > > > that.
> > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them
> > > > > > > > > hands
> > > > > > > > > would
> > > > > > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which
> > > > > > > > > is a
> > > > > > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > > > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means
> > > > > > > just
> > > > > > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is
> > > > > > > hairy.
> > > > > > > we
> > > > > > > were real cut ups.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > > > > > “season”??
> > > > > > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs
> > > > > > all
> > > > > > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > > > > > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > >
> > > > > Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman
> > > > > because
> > > > > she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> > > > > pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered
> > > > > thousands
> > > > > of times.
> > > > > I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.
> > > > And you are just the man to do it just because.
> > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > >
> > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > Groucho Marx
> > >
> > > That last post was unbelievably embarrassing. I only have one of two
> > > possible
> > > explanations for it:
> > >
> > > I was really drunk at the time, or two:
> > >
> > > My niece Felicity has yet again stolen my password, and those words are
> > > hers.
> > Or both???
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized that
> Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.

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Subject: Re: Adam and Eve
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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by: Don Stockbauer - Tue, 4 Apr 2023 01:10 UTC

On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 3:44:37 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Apr 2, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<1e1d5220-84ea-429b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > On Sunday, April 2, 2023 at 3:16:36 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On Apr 1, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > (in article<035ef44d-f4b1-4a1b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > On Saturday, April 1, 2023 at 5:07:35 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 2:01:12 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > (in article<704a2fce-31f7-413b...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 11:00:52 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 31, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > (in article<27e2f4d2-8afe-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 31, 2023 at 3:01:28 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<16a32ce4-27e7-4acb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 3:36:58 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d90eb09f-293c-463c...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 30, 2023 at 1:03:45 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 30, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<0b84dec9-6ad1-40bb...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 29, 2023 at 1:28:47 PM UTC-5, Mike
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Mar 29, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<8c3246dd-de72-42f1...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a showcase of errors : they're my high school
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diploma,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > junior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > college diploma in my University of Texas diploma.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you got from that mill town that just ground them
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > out???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes. It so irritated me that my diplomas aren't even worth
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > they're
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > printed on that I got a headache and had to take a Miltown.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Which you obtain from the House of Pill Repute
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Isn't a house of pill repute just a pharmacy ? A place that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > sells
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > pills
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > which
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > have a bad reputation?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Where there is a pill, there is a way.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > And where there's a will, there's a bunch of money hungry heirs
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > fighting
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > over
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > the estate.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > A fight that could be avoided by a simple 8 word will
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > “Being of sound mind, I spent it all"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Couldnt a total nut job make the statement "being of sound mind "
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I read a science-fiction story once where there was this room , in
> > > > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > > > center
> > > > > > > > > > > > of it sat the matriarch of the family with about 10 relatives
> > > > > > > > > > > > scattered
> > > > > > > > > > > > around the rest of it, she would write them in and out of the will
> > > > > > > > > > > > on a
> > > > > > > > > > > > total
> > > > > > > > > > > > whim, like if one of them looked at her funny.
> > > > > > > > > > > Didn’t out mother are you about making funny faces??
> > > > > > > > > > > , if you kept it up your face would freeze up leaving you looking
> > > > > > > > > > > like
> > > > > > > > > > > that.
> > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Yes, and she also told me if I chewed my nails and swallowed them
> > > > > > > > > > hands
> > > > > > > > > > would
> > > > > > > > > > grow in my stomach . And if I got too close to a scissor tail, which
> > > > > > > > > > is a
> > > > > > > > > > bird , that the tail would cut my hands off.
> > > > > > > > > I notice you did not mention your hairy hands
> > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > There's this thing "Every Tom, Dick or Harry" which I believe means
> > > > > > > > just
> > > > > > > > about anyone at all , and in class we changed that to Tom's dick is
> > > > > > > > hairy.
> > > > > > > > we
> > > > > > > > were real cut ups.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Do you know why female cats do not have sex unless forced to by being in
> > > > > > > “season”??
> > > > > > > Its because the penis of of the male cat is covered by small stiff hairs
> > > > > > > all
> > > > > > > pointing in the wrong direction.
> > > > > > > Which is why she will not put out for just any Tom dick’n hairy
> > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Well, I can go one better than that. I've never had sex with a woman
> > > > > > because
> > > > > > she could easily array layers and layers of needles in her vagina all
> > > > > > pointing so that upon entering her I would have my penis skewered
> > > > > > thousands
> > > > > > of times.
> > > > > > I mean , it's unlikely, but anything that's possible can be done.
> > > > > And you are just the man to do it just because.
> > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > >
> > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > >
> > > > That last post was unbelievably embarrassing. I only have one of two
> > > > possible
> > > > explanations for it:
> > > >
> > > > I was really drunk at the time, or two:
> > > >
> > > > My niece Felicity has yet again stolen my password, and those words are
> > > > hers.
> > > Or both???
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized that
> > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing iron.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

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Subject: Re: Adam and Eve
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by: Mike - Tue, 4 Apr 2023 09:10 UTC

On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<f19ca20f-cca6-4795-8c8f-bcb138e320b8n@googlegroups.com>):

> On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized
> > > that
> > > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> > Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing iron.
>
> My father's cattle brand was a combined F and S. you can even describe it
> without graphics but merely use text , and it goes "take a capital F with
> crossbar and pin an S onto the F where the crossbar meets the vertical
> segment , rotate the S 90° either way and remove the crossbar .

Without you there as a patron, Any bar would be cross at the loss of income.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Adam and Eve

<3a66fc3f-57f5-40ea-ad59-cb5d928579d9n@googlegroups.com>

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Subject: Re: Adam and Eve
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by: Don Stockbauer - Tue, 4 Apr 2023 12:18 UTC

On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 4:10:46 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<f19ca20f-cca6-4795...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized
> > > > that
> > > > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> > > Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing iron.
> >
> > My father's cattle brand was a combined F and S. you can even describe it
> > without graphics but merely use text , and it goes "take a capital F with
> > crossbar and pin an S onto the F where the crossbar meets the vertical
> > segment , rotate the S 90° either way and remove the crossbar .
> Without you there as a patron, Any bar would be cross at the loss of income.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

but Jesus died upon the cross.

Re: Adam and Eve

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by: Mike - Tue, 4 Apr 2023 13:19 UTC

On Apr 4, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<3a66fc3f-57f5-40ea-ad59-cb5d928579d9n@googlegroups.com>):

> On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 4:10:46 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<f19ca20f-cca6-4795...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized
> > > > > that
> > > > > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> > > > Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing
> > > > iron.
> > >
> > > My father's cattle brand was a combined F and S. you can even describe it
> > > without graphics but merely use text , and it goes "take a capital F with
> > > crossbar and pin an S onto the F where the crossbar meets the vertical
> > > segment , rotate the S 90° either way and remove the crossbar .
> > Without you there as a patron, Any bar would be cross at the loss of income.
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> but Jesus died upon the cross.

Very rood of the Romans to do that to him.

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Re: Adam and Eve

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Subject: Re: Adam and Eve
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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by: Don Stockbauer - Tue, 4 Apr 2023 19:31 UTC

On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 8:19:16 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On Apr 4, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<3a66fc3f-57f5-40ea...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 4:10:46 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<f19ca20f-cca6-4795...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized
> > > > > > that
> > > > > > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> > > > > Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing
> > > > > iron.
> > > >
> > > > My father's cattle brand was a combined F and S. you can even describe it
> > > > without graphics but merely use text , and it goes "take a capital F with
> > > > crossbar and pin an S onto the F where the crossbar meets the vertical
> > > > segment , rotate the S 90° either way and remove the crossbar ..
> > > Without you there as a patron, Any bar would be cross at the loss of income.
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > but Jesus died upon the cross.
> Very rood of the Romans to do that to him.
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

he should've gotten himself a good lawyer.

Re: Adam and Eve

<0001HW.29DD8B110002BC6B70000ABE638F@news.supernews.com>

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by: Mike - Wed, 5 Apr 2023 10:55 UTC

On Apr 4, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<fb070177-327b-4784-ad4a-e104ad3bc08bn@googlegroups.com>):

> On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 8:19:16 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Apr 4, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<3a66fc3f-57f5-40ea...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > On Tuesday, April 4, 2023 at 4:10:46 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > (in article<f19ca20f-cca6-4795...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > On Monday, April 3, 2023 at 10:20:34 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > On Apr 3, 2023, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > (in article<19bee9cd-f25b-4592...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > You are correct, Mike , when I came out of my drunken stupor I realized
> > > > > > > that
> > > > > > > Felicity got my password by brandishing a 44 magnum at my head.
> > > > > > Was it a stolen 44Magnum ??? If so she got you with a HOT brandishing
> > > > > > iron.
> > > > >
> > > > > My father's cattle brand was a combined F and S. you can even describe it
> > > > > without graphics but merely use text , and it goes "take a capital F with
> > > > > crossbar and pin an S onto the F where the crossbar meets the vertical
> > > > > segment , rotate the S 90° either way and remove the crossbar .
> > > > Without you there as a patron, Any bar would be cross at the loss of
> > > > income.
> > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > >
> > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > Groucho Marx
> > >
> > > but Jesus died upon the cross.
> > Very rood of the Romans to do that to him.
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> he should've gotten himself a good lawyer.

But all that he had available to pick from at the time were Honest Lawyers

Michael LeVine
mlevine@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

Friction is a drag.

interests / alt.humor.puns / Re: Adam and Eve

interests / alt.humor.puns / Re: Adam and Eve

Subject	Author
re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike
Re: Adam and Eve	Don Stockbauer
Re: Adam and Eve	Mike