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interests / alt.life.sucks / Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

SubjectAuthor
* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
`* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
 `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
  `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
   `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
    `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
     `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
      `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
       `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
        `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         +* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |+- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |`* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         | `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |  `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |   `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |    `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |     `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |      `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |       `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |        +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |        `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |         `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |          +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |          `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |           `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            +- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            +* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            |`* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         |            | `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            |  `* Fwd: How to cook a cat with your coffee makerJudith Latham
         |            |   `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            |    `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            |     `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            |      `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            |       `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         |            |        `- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerOllieNorthie@aol.com
         |            `- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
         `* How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph
          `- How to cook a cat with your coffee makerThomas Joseph

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Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Fri, 25 Jun 2021 23:23 UTC

On Friday, June 25, 2021 at 3:55:30 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Imagine being one of these gender questioning people? Trying to figure out their sex whether than going with what nature gave them? Or being a race other than white like. My race and sex are all the best in the world. So why feel bad? Well I do feel bad. I want to be rich too! Oh God what a cruel fate to only be well off!
> I don't believe those assholes are genuinely questioning their gender. Not only do they know what they were born as, they know just as well what they want to be. They probably even have a name for it. Their own personal name. But since it's their alone no one cares enough about it to make it official. You need a group to achieve that kind of action. But seriously, I believe they know what they are but pretend they don't know as a means of getting attention. If they started yelling, "I know what I am", walking down Main Street, no one would listen to them, might even order them to shut up or move on. But if they stand on Main Street questioning what they are or instating that not knowing what they are is some kind of 'disease' or 'disorder' shared by many, then it becomes a cause and suddenly everyone is involved..
>
> Hey man, it's a happening!

Another way to make money without working. Demand special jobs to make sure no one is left behind. Meanwhile billions are left behind every day but they have no way to make anyone care. Do you care? I bet you don't.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Mon, 28 Jun 2021 00:56 UTC

> Another way to make money without working. Demand special jobs to make sure no one is left behind. Meanwhile billions are left behind every day but they have no way to make anyone care. Do you care? I bet you don't.

Ok, you got me - I don't care. But I never said I do. And also while we're at it, truth is I do care. Who the fuck are you to tell me I don't care. I am insulted. I am outraged. I am insulted. My honor is at stake. I demand a duel. I have already chosen someone to represent me in the duel. You have one week to do the same unless you are willing to appear as yourself. Either way you won't see me, but you will suffer the consequences anyway. You will pay for having the audacity to tell me not only to my face but in front of the whole world represented by our vast readership that I do not care when in reality I do. I care a lot. Now I care even more. You have unveiled my emotions. You have rawed me out. You have brought me to the truth. And the truth is, you must take back what you just said about me or you MUST DIE.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
Injection-Date: Mon, 28 Jun 2021 05:30:27 +0000
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Mon, 28 Jun 2021 05:30 UTC

On Sunday, June 27, 2021 at 8:56:28 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Another way to make money without working. Demand special jobs to make sure no one is left behind. Meanwhile billions are left behind every day but they have no way to make anyone care. Do you care? I bet you don't.
> Ok, you got me - I don't care. But I never said I do. And also while we're at it, truth is I do care. Who the fuck are you to tell me I don't care. I am insulted. I am outraged. I am insulted. My honor is at stake. I demand a duel. I have already chosen someone to represent me in the duel. You have one week to do the same unless you are willing to appear as yourself. Either way you won't see me, but you will suffer the consequences anyway. You will pay for having the audacity to tell me not only to my face but in front of the whole world represented by our vast readership that I do not care when in reality I do. I care a lot. Now I care even more. You have unveiled my emotions. You have rawed me out. You have brought me to the truth. And the truth is, you must take back what you just said about me or you MUST DIE.

You are failing to learn this game.
You have been Skyvied. Fell for it.

No duel is necessary. But I can arrange it if you must go down that road. Sky is my second.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Mon, 28 Jun 2021 21:38 UTC

> No duel is necessary. But I can arrange it if you must go down that road. Sky is my second.

I am calling off the duel because Sky is my friend and any friend of Sky's is a friend of mine. Not that I wouldn't kill a friend. Believe me, I would. But I'd have to have a good reason. Or better yet no reason at all. Nothing in between. No small potatoes. If I'm going to kill it's going to be over something big, or it's going to be over nothing at all. Killing a purely innocent victim on the basis of chance - an eeny meeny minee mo type thing. Like getting up in the morning and saying, "I'm going to kill the first person I see today wearing a green shirt" (for example)................

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From: jud...@sick-of-spam.invalid (Judith Latham)
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 by: Judith Latham - Tue, 29 Jun 2021 00:47 UTC

On 6/28/2021 5:38 PM, Thomas Joseph wrote:
>
>> No duel is necessary. But I can arrange it if you must go down that road. Sky is my second.
>
> I am calling off the duel because Sky is my friend and any friend of Sky's is a friend of mine. Not that I wouldn't kill a friend. Believe me, I would. But I'd have to have a good reason. Or better yet no reason at all. Nothing in between. No small potatoes. If I'm going to kill it's going to be over something big, or it's going to be over nothing at all. Killing a purely innocent victim on the basis of chance - an eeny meeny minee mo type thing. Like getting up in the morning and saying, "I'm going to kill the first person I see today wearing a green shirt" (for example)...............
>

Why the color green? Green is a soothing color, very non-threatening.
Shoot the first guy wearing a pink shirt. Men who wear pink shirts
deserve to get shot.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Tue, 29 Jun 2021 04:18 UTC

> Why the color green? Green is a soothing color, very non-threatening.
> Shoot the first guy wearing a pink shirt. Men who wear pink shirts
> deserve to get shot.

Do you remember my words? The gist of my post? I said if I'm going to kill someone I want it to be a totally innocent person. Of course nobody is totally innocent. Wrong word. I do not mean innocent. Everyone is guilty of something. I mean they do not deserve to die at my hand. They have done nothing to me. They mean nothing. The less they have done to hurt me the less they mean to me - until they reach a point where they mean so little they qualify for slaughter under the guidelines of random no apparent reason type murders. When the Judge asks me why I did it I will reply, "No reason", before screaming, "Does there always have to be a reason? For everything?"

Now yes you are correct, green is a soothing color. I know, I am a good pool player. They cloth is green for just that reason, soft on the eyes, soothing, non threatening, pastural. But if you read my post and caught the gist of my purpose - which is to have no purpose ultimately - you would know that I would choose to kill a person wearing a green shirt for the very reason that it is non threatening. When I kill for random pleasure I want to kill the most non threatening people I can find. The most innocent as I called them the first time. Killing innocent people makes me feel more guilty than I already do. This guilt in turn makes me feel like I'm paying some kind of penance, sacrificing something, like carrying the cross for miles with holes in my feet - pilgrimage type stuff. This in turn puts me in good with God, so if there's a heaven I will get a good spot in line. To feel really guilty about lots of different stuff to the point where I'm always apologizing and asking for forgiveness - who knows, that could get me into heaven.

Green is the color of my true love's teeth

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Thu, 1 Jul 2021 15:46 UTC

On Tuesday, June 29, 2021 at 12:18:49 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Why the color green? Green is a soothing color, very non-threatening.
> > Shoot the first guy wearing a pink shirt. Men who wear pink shirts
> > deserve to get shot.
> Do you remember my words? The gist of my post? I said if I'm going to kill someone I want it to be a totally innocent person. Of course nobody is totally innocent. Wrong word. I do not mean innocent. Everyone is guilty of something. I mean they do not deserve to die at my hand. They have done nothing to me. They mean nothing. The less they have done to hurt me the less they mean to me - until they reach a point where they mean so little they qualify for slaughter under the guidelines of random no apparent reason type murders. When the Judge asks me why I did it I will reply, "No reason", before screaming, "Does there always have to be a reason? For everything?"
>
> Now yes you are correct, green is a soothing color. I know, I am a good pool player. They cloth is green for just that reason, soft on the eyes, soothing, non threatening, pastural. But if you read my post and caught the gist of my purpose - which is to have no purpose ultimately - you would know that I would choose to kill a person wearing a green shirt for the very reason that it is non threatening. When I kill for random pleasure I want to kill the most non threatening people I can find. The most innocent as I called them the first time. Killing innocent people makes me feel more guilty than I already do. This guilt in turn makes me feel like I'm paying some kind of penance, sacrificing something, like carrying the cross for miles with holes in my feet - pilgrimage type stuff. This in turn puts me in good with God, so if there's a heaven I will get a good spot in line. To feel really guilty about lots of different stuff to the point where I'm always apologizing and asking for forgiveness - who knows, that could get me into heaven..
>
> Green is the color of my true love's teeth

I have seen orange pool tables and red ones too. So explain that. If you can.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Thu, 1 Jul 2021 19:50 UTC

> I have seen orange pool tables and red ones too. So explain that. If you can.

I can and I will. I have played on gold and red and even blue tables. I suppose a really good player isn't going to let the color affect him. But it has been 'proved' that green is a most relaxing color that is easy on the eyes, and that is why, supposedly, most pool tables are green. I have walked into many poolrooms with different colored tables. But I'll be most top tournaments use green. I will have to research it. I will google it later for the usual conflicting responses.

What if the table cloths were black? Players miss and blame the table as they often do regardless of the table's color. But in this case some of the competitors are Black and they get steamed when they hear frustrated players yelling at the tables after missing uncharacteristically, "You got me again, you black bastard", referring to the cloth but taken as a racial slur by the Black players. Protests abound as later black cloths are officially outlawed even in recreational settings or private homes. No seriously, I will google it up later. I have heard green was used because it's easiest on the eyes, but just because I heard it doesn't mean it's true (although so far I think it is).

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Thu, 1 Jul 2021 20:07 UTC

I copied and pasted this and do not expect you to read the whole thing. I found some of it interesting. But not once did they mention green being easier on the eyes, and as the article grew longer and longer I began to wonder if it might be a commercial for something - and sure enough if you look at the last paragraph below you will see it.

So without having to read the whole thing I would say the first paragraph and the last will do just fine. I didn't read the whole thing. But I'm a decent scanner. I found one paragraph interesting which I have sandwiched between two rows of //////////////s. It's something I never heard of before and found it interesting. Could be true what they say about the green cloth not translating well to the cameras. But in real life I have always heard that green is considered one of the easiest colors on the eyes. See, your question did not spur me to debate. Rather it urged me to search out the truth. To learn something new. That's just the kind of guy I am, always wanting to learn more on the road to the grave. Remember now, if you read it at all, just paragraphs #1 and the final paragraph and the one sandwiched between the /////////s. Thank you Students!

WHY ARE POOL TABLES GREEN?

The answer to why pool tables are green lies in their history. You may have looked at the green table during a pool game and thought “that it looks an awful lot like a field sports game”, and you’d be absolutely right! Pool, snooker and billiards, or ‘cue games’ can trace their origin to lawn games from over 600 years ago. The first lawn game that could be distinctly recognised as billiards was played in the 1340s. This game was brought indoors sometime during the 1400s by King Louis XI of France, who had the first known indoor billiards table.

During 1600s, the popularity table billiards had spread across England and France, with the original outdoors version dying out almost entirely. When the decision was made to bring the game indoors and onto the table, so was the decision to use green cloth. This allowed the table surface of the indoor game to resemble the grass that the original game had been played on.

Today the custom of using green grass-coloured cloth for tables has persisted, with green having the become the traditional color for all cue games. Even to new players, the resemblance of the green table surface to a grass playing field is immediately clear.

But wait! What about blue pool tables? You’ve probably seen the distinctive blue color blue pool tables getting called ‘TV blue’ or ‘tournament blue’, due to their use in televised pool tournaments. But why do televised tournaments use blue instead of green? Does it symbolise a different league of pool from the games we play in pubs and bars? The reason that some televised pool tournaments use blue pool table cloth is actually far more practical.

/////////////////////////////////////////////

When the U.S. Open Pocket Billiards Championship first aired on television in the 1970s, the green color of the tables made following the balls harder to see on television screens. For this reason, the cloth color for tables in televised pool championships was switched to blue, allowing viewers to follow games with greater ease and avoid the eye strain that the bright green color caused. Blue pool tables are still used in US Open Pool Championships to this day, despite the colour reproduction of modern televisions no longer having the problems that first caused the switch to blue table fabric. Due to it’s association with tournaments, blue pool tables have become popular throughout the United States even for privately owned pool tables.

////////////////////////////////////////////

WHY IS POOL CHALK BLUE?
While the reason for green pool tables is tradition, and the the reason for blue pool tables is practicality, the reason for blue chalk is a little more dubious. While today the blue cue chalk is still used out of tradition, its exact beginnings are uncertain.

The origin of blue cue calk is often attributed to a man named Jack Carr, a billiards marker (scorer/referee) from Bath, who made a fortune with his ingenious swindle. Carr’s cue chalk story begins during the time that cues were transitioning from the simple wooden sticks of the past to the modern leather-tipped cues we know today. To improve the poor performance of simple wooden-tipped cues, players experimented with filling the tips to soften the wood. Others players, while idly twisting the tips their cues into the plaster walls and ceilings of billiard halls, discovered that the fine limestone powder would improved the cue’s performance. In the early 1800s, a French army captain named François Mingaud created the leather tipped cues that are the basis of cues used today. These cues greatly improved their accuracy in hitting balls, but even these newer cues did not deliver a perfect hit.

Jack Carr, remembering earlier techniques with powder from plaster walls, realised that he could further improve Mingaud’s cues by chalking them. Some time during the late 1820s, Carr was selling small containers of blue-dyed chalk and marketing it as his ‘magic twisting chalk’. The added traction from combining leather tips with chalk allowed players to create new techniques, like sending balls down a curved path by hitting the side of the ball to add a spin. News of his ‘magic chalk’ spread like fire, and he made a fortune by selling it for a half crown, about the average weekly wage of that time.
Carr’s business eventually fell through, as customers realised that the ‘magic twisting chalk’ was simply white chalk that had been coloured blue, and that any regular white chalk was just as effective (and far cheaper!). While players were no longer willing to pay such steep prices for a box of ordinary chalk, the blue colour became a custom and persisted even after the Carr’s chalk con had ended.

This is how the popular tale goes, but sources are sketchy. The fist known accounts of Carr’s magic chalk come from the 1858, but no mention of the colour is made. Similarly, there are written accounts indicating that blue chalk first appeared in 1828, but no reason for its emergence is given. Regardless of the color of the ‘magic chalk’, standard white chalk was still commonly used throughout the 1800s.

A more verifiable origin of blue chalk, as a standard color, begins with an 1884 patent from Anthony Peple, a billiard player from Brooklyn. Peple’s patent described a cube of chalk that was colored green to reduce discoloration on green tables and covered with paper to protect against contamination from the oil on skin. The coloured chalk was awarded patent and began sale by Brunswick-Balke-Collender Co. in 1885. In the 1890s, a chalk substitute began sale in Paris that used blue colouration due to the American patent. This chalk substitute contained silica, which gave is greater binding qualities in comparison to chalk, quickly gaining it a reputation for it’s superior quality to green chalk.

Silica chalk substitutes were eventually sold in both green and blue, free from Peple’s patent due to it’s differing composition. Despite the chalk substitute’s new availability in green, the color blue still proved to be more popular with players due to it’s reputation as a higher quality chalk. Over 100 years later, blue chalk is still the popular choice with players of pool and snooker.

ARE THERE OTHER POOL TABLE COLOURS AND CHALK COLOURS?
Now that you know that green cloth is used for it’s likeness to grass, and chalk is coloured to reduce discoloration of tables, you may be wondering if there are other pool table colours available. Traditions can be fun, but do you really need a green table? Oh course not! Not only are uniquely coloured pool tables growing popularity, they’re actively encouraged by Hainsworth, the UK’s industry leader of cue sports table cloth. Hainsworth, which has been active since 1783, offers pool cloth on every colour you can imagine playing pool on, and then some. They even retroactively made blue chalk correctly match table cloth colour, with the of release their ‘powder blue’ table cloth.

When it comes to the pool table colors available today, ‘all the colors of the rainbow’ doesn’t do justice to Hainsworth. There is just red, there’s bright red, windsor red, burgundy red, maroon red and more.

Hainsworth Pool Cloth – Elite Pro RedHainsworth Pool Cloth – Elite Pro Bright RedHainsworth Pool Cloth – Smart Widsor RedHainsworth Pool Cloth – Club BurgundyHainsworth Pool Cloth – Smart Maroon

Red is just the beginning, there are snooker and pool cloth colors to match any them of room you need to fill, whether you’re setting up your pool haven at home or renovating a pool and snooker club, there’s no better selection or quality than Hainsworth snooker and pool cloth. For a closer look at the available for pool table colours, take a look at our Hainsworth cloths section.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Thu, 1 Jul 2021 20:16 UTC

I found that article interesting, the way it was presented as a history lesson, which maybe in some way it was, before segueing into a commercial for their many different colored pool table cloths. It was funny how they couldn't just advertise the different colors right off the bat - they first had to convince the reader that the traditional green cloth is not only not necessary, it is in fact bad on the eyes. It was funny how they got around to that part. That is where I began to suspect there was a commercial on the way. And then sure enough at the end it came. It was funny how they could not sell the different colored cloths on their own, they first had to put down traditional green cloths to bolster their case. It was interesting how I read their report as an honest history lesson only to then begin to suspect they were selling something when they started to get down on traditional green cloths. They went too far. That is when I saw the commercial coming. While I found the article interesting in parts, I can't accept it as official history due to the ultimate sales pitch.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Fri, 2 Jul 2021 14:41 UTC

On Thursday, July 1, 2021 at 4:16:29 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> I found that article interesting, the way it was presented as a history lesson, which maybe in some way it was, before segueing into a commercial for their many different colored pool table cloths. It was funny how they couldn't just advertise the different colors right off the bat - they first had to convince the reader that the traditional green cloth is not only not necessary, it is in fact bad on the eyes. It was funny how they got around to that part. That is where I began to suspect there was a commercial on the way. And then sure enough at the end it came. It was funny how they could not sell the different colored cloths on their own, they first had to put down traditional green cloths to bolster their case. It was interesting how I read their report as an honest history lesson only to then begin to suspect they were selling something when they started to get down on traditional green cloths. They went too far. That is when I saw the commercial coming. While I found the article interesting in parts, I can't accept it as official history due to the ultimate sales pitch.

I am the worlds worse pool player. I shoot pure slop. In fact I should go on tour displaying my horrible ability.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Fri, 2 Jul 2021 18:20 UTC

> I am the worlds worse pool player. I shoot pure slop. In fact I should go on tour displaying my horrible ability.

Some of the top players are like robots, machines. The pockets are tighter and tougher today. I played on slop tables and got used to it. I was a good player but not great although as I have said many times I never reached my peak. But it's over and who cares?

Funny about how we see ourselves as good at things. And maybe sometimes we are. We might be the best in a small circle, like the fastest runner in class, a small class. I was also a good pinball machine player. I loved pinball. But I learned how to play through cheating. Do you remember the old machines with the metal rollovers the balls passed over to rack up score? At the bowling alley in Allentown they had a room with 6 pinball machines and I would play all day after someone showed me how to cheat it. You put the machine up on your toes. You have to do this first, of course. If you do it after putting in the coin the machine will tilt. So you get the machine up on your toes which levels out the machine so when you shoot the ball out it rolls very slowly across the rollovers. So slowly you can catch it and keep it there and gently shake the machine back and forth to make the score soar to put 26 free games on the machine. So with this advantage I was able to play a lot. I became pretty good at it. That never would have happened had I had to pay all the time.

I may have told you this before but I'm telling you again because it's a revealing tale of competition and how relative it is. As I said I was the best pinball player at the poolroom. One day a guy told me, "Hey Tommy, they're having a pinball tournament at the Paladium, you ought to go down and sign up." And I did.

I forget how much it cost or if I even paid to enter, I just remember being taken to a machine that was on a very steep slope, which made the ball move really fast. Plus the flippers were ultra small. I always hated those type flippers. Still it was a machine and I figured no big deal. Some pinballs give 5 balls, this was a 3 ball machine. I drained all 3 of them in less than probably 5 seconds per ball. I was amazed, blown away by the difference between this machine and the ones I dominated at the poolroom. It was a real eye opener. Some of the best pinball players in the world were in that tournament, I'm assuming. It was some kind of national thing. I had no idea they made pinballs that tough. So anyway, it's pretty funny how one minute you can think you're the best at something only to find out in a big fat hurry that you are not only not the best, you ain't even close. Looking back I enjoyed it. Also, I did not stick around to watch other guys play. So not only have I never played against top pinball players, I have never even seen them play.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Fri, 9 Jul 2021 19:57 UTC

On Friday, July 2, 2021 at 2:20:27 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I am the worlds worse pool player. I shoot pure slop. In fact I should go on tour displaying my horrible ability.
> Some of the top players are like robots, machines. The pockets are tighter and tougher today. I played on slop tables and got used to it. I was a good player but not great although as I have said many times I never reached my peak. But it's over and who cares?
>
> Funny about how we see ourselves as good at things. And maybe sometimes we are. We might be the best in a small circle, like the fastest runner in class, a small class. I was also a good pinball machine player. I loved pinball. But I learned how to play through cheating. Do you remember the old machines with the metal rollovers the balls passed over to rack up score? At the bowling alley in Allentown they had a room with 6 pinball machines and I would play all day after someone showed me how to cheat it. You put the machine up on your toes. You have to do this first, of course. If you do it after putting in the coin the machine will tilt. So you get the machine up on your toes which levels out the machine so when you shoot the ball out it rolls very slowly across the rollovers. So slowly you can catch it and keep it there and gently shake the machine back and forth to make the score soar to put 26 free games on the machine. So with this advantage I was able to play a lot. I became pretty good at it. That never would have happened had I had to pay all the time.
>
> I may have told you this before but I'm telling you again because it's a revealing tale of competition and how relative it is. As I said I was the best pinball player at the poolroom. One day a guy told me, "Hey Tommy, they're having a pinball tournament at the Paladium, you ought to go down and sign up." And I did.
>
> I forget how much it cost or if I even paid to enter, I just remember being taken to a machine that was on a very steep slope, which made the ball move really fast. Plus the flippers were ultra small. I always hated those type flippers. Still it was a machine and I figured no big deal. Some pinballs give 5 balls, this was a 3 ball machine. I drained all 3 of them in less than probably 5 seconds per ball. I was amazed, blown away by the difference between this machine and the ones I dominated at the poolroom. It was a real eye opener. Some of the best pinball players in the world were in that tournament, I'm assuming. It was some kind of national thing. I had no idea they made pinballs that tough. So anyway, it's pretty funny how one minute you can think you're the best at something only to find out in a big fat hurry that you are not only not the best, you ain't even close. Looking back I enjoyed it. Also, I did not stick around to watch other guys play. So not only have I never played against top pinball players, I have never even seen them play.

Tommy you have to be deaf, dumb, and blind. Hellen Keller was a great pinballer. But a lousy lay.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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From: jud...@sick-of-spam.invalid (Judith Latham)
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 by: Judith Latham - Fri, 9 Jul 2021 22:25 UTC

On 7/9/2021 3:57 PM, OllieNorthie@aol.com wrote:
> On Friday, July 2, 2021 at 2:20:27 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
>>> I am the worlds worse pool player. I shoot pure slop. In fact I should go on tour displaying my horrible ability.
>> Some of the top players are like robots, machines. The pockets are tighter and tougher today. I played on slop tables and got used to it. I was a good player but not great although as I have said many times I never reached my peak. But it's over and who cares?
>>
>> Funny about how we see ourselves as good at things. And maybe sometimes we are. We might be the best in a small circle, like the fastest runner in class, a small class. I was also a good pinball machine player. I loved pinball. But I learned how to play through cheating. Do you remember the old machines with the metal rollovers the balls passed over to rack up score? At the bowling alley in Allentown they had a room with 6 pinball machines and I would play all day after someone showed me how to cheat it. You put the machine up on your toes. You have to do this first, of course. If you do it after putting in the coin the machine will tilt. So you get the machine up on your toes which levels out the machine so when you shoot the ball out it rolls very slowly across the rollovers. So slowly you can catch it and keep it there and gently shake the machine back and forth to make the score soar to put 26 free games on the machine. So with this advantage I was able to play a lot. I became pretty good at it. That never would have happened had I had to pay all the time.
>>
>> I may have told you this before but I'm telling you again because it's a revealing tale of competition and how relative it is. As I said I was the best pinball player at the poolroom. One day a guy told me, "Hey Tommy, they're having a pinball tournament at the Paladium, you ought to go down and sign up." And I did.
>>
>> I forget how much it cost or if I even paid to enter, I just remember being taken to a machine that was on a very steep slope, which made the ball move really fast. Plus the flippers were ultra small. I always hated those type flippers. Still it was a machine and I figured no big deal. Some pinballs give 5 balls, this was a 3 ball machine. I drained all 3 of them in less than probably 5 seconds per ball. I was amazed, blown away by the difference between this machine and the ones I dominated at the poolroom. It was a real eye opener. Some of the best pinball players in the world were in that tournament, I'm assuming. It was some kind of national thing. I had no idea they made pinballs that tough. So anyway, it's pretty funny how one minute you can think you're the best at something only to find out in a big fat hurry that you are not only not the best, you ain't even close. Looking back I enjoyed it. Also, I did not stick around to watch other guys play. So not only have I never played against top pinball players, I have never even seen them play.
>
> Tommy you have to be deaf, dumb, and blind. Hellen Keller was a great pinballer. But a lousy lay.
>
Hellen's mother was a particularly cruel woman. Just for amusement, she
would rearrange all the furniture in the house whenever Helen were to go
out for a few hours. Some thought she was trying to make amends by
taking Helen bowling, but others thought she was just further mocking
her. Life wasn't easy for Helen Keller. I understand why she would be a
lousy lay.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Fri, 9 Jul 2021 22:49 UTC

> Tommy you have to be deaf, dumb, and blind. Hellen Keller was a great pinballer. But a lousy lay.

I absolutely hated The Who and their music, most of it, especially the blind pinball wizard thing. I just never got it. Maybe that's why I never got anywhere in the pinball world. Truth is I was good. I know I was good. I coulda been the best. So I didn't try hard enough, so what? Another truth you and other "Skyving-pullers" don't want to admit to is that there is not a single thing on this earth I can't do better than Helen Keller ever could. Except for being a decent worthwhile human being - ok, so maybe in that one little category she comes out on top.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Fri, 9 Jul 2021 22:56 UTC

> Hellen's mother was a particularly cruel woman. Just for amusement, she
> would rearrange all the furniture in the house whenever Helen were to go
> out for a few hours. Some thought she was trying to make amends by
> taking Helen bowling, but others thought she was just further mocking
> her. Life wasn't easy for Helen Keller. I understand why she would be a
> lousy lay.

I hate that term, lousy lay. Ok, some women have extraordinarily large cunts - so large that even the largest of cocks gets lost within - in that case it's not their fault, it's just the way they came packaged.

Anyway, I don't know how old you are, but I've been around a while. I fucked Helen Keller. Was she a good lay? I hate that term but I'll answer your question anyway: She was the best lay I ever had. Totally uninhibited. I told her my cock was my face and my face was my cock. I had her going all over the place. What a blast. She had a powerful odor to her. Not saying it was bad. Just strong, real strong. They say when a person is blind other senses step up to make up for it. They hear better. They feel better. They have a way stronger sense of smell. Scientists know this. What they don't know - or maybe they know it but just never talk about it - is that blind people not only have a strong sense of smell, they themselves actually smell stronger. When everything goes dark around the eyes everything else comes alive with sparkling fury. Anyway, she smelled, she was uninhibited, she was wild, and she was different. God help the son of a bitch who has anything bad to say about her, joke or not.

Fwd: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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From: jud...@sick-of-spam.invalid (Judith Latham)
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 by: Judith Latham - Sat, 10 Jul 2021 03:22 UTC

>> Hellen's mother was a particularly cruel woman. Just for amusement, she
>> would rearrange all the furniture in the house whenever Helen were to go
>> out for a few hours. Some thought she was trying to make amends by
>> taking Helen bowling, but others thought she was just further mocking
>> her. Life wasn't easy for Helen Keller. I understand why she would be a
>> lousy lay.
> I hate that term, lousy lay. Ok, some women have extraordinarily large cunts - so large that even the largest of cocks gets lost within - in that case it's not their fault, it's just the way they came packaged.
> Anyway, I don't know how old you are, but I've been around a while. I fucked Helen Keller. Was she a good lay? I hate that term but I'll answer your question anyway: She was the best lay I ever had. Totally uninhibited. I told her my cock was my face and my face was my cock. I had her going all over the place. What a blast. She had a powerful odor to her. Not saying it was bad. Just strong, real strong. They say when a person is blind other senses step up to make up for it. They hear better. They feel better. They have a way stronger sense of smell. Scientists know this. What they don't know - or maybe they know it but just never talk about it - is that blind people not only have a strong sense of smell, they themselves actually smell stronger. When everything goes dark around the eyes everything else comes alive with sparkling fury. Anyway, she smelled, she was uninhibited, she was wild, and she was different. God help the son of a bitch who has anything bad to say about her, joke or not.

You are correct that the odor is not her fault. I have a cousin who was
also born deaf, dumb, and blind. Learning to read and write was easy,
hygeine was another matter. Nobody knew how to teach her to wipe her
ass. She has spent her whole life wearing diapers. Walking around with
shit in your pants 24/7 can make one immune to the smell that premeats.
Sadly the same can't be said for those around her. I'm sure the same
situation exists for Miss Keller. You are a very kind person to not
embarrass her for her condition.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Sat, 10 Jul 2021 08:14 UTC

"Walking around with shit in your pants 24/7 can make one immune to the smell that premeates. Sadly the same can't be said for those around her. I'm sure the same situation exists for Miss Keller. You are a very kind person to not embarrass her for her condition."

I was was joking about having sex with Helen Keller. Truth is, Helen was my mother's sister - same mother, different fathers. Like Helen my mother was handicapped. She was mentally ill. Most of her young adult life was spent in a variety of institutions for the criminally insane. She and Helen did not get along.

Later after Helen became famous many in our family were worried Helen's fame might take my mother's already fragile mind and splinter it to bits. Funny thing though, it had the opposite effect. In occasional lucid states my mother was able to comprehend the positive impact Helen had on people's lives. My mother grew to admire and love Helen. It was a cathartic moment. In no time she became instantly cured - no longer cowering in the shadows, no longer afraid to live life on her own terms - at long last she was able to break out of her shell of isolation and loneliness to do what she had had wanted inwardly to do for years - she went out beyond the nuthouse walls and killed the first person she saw. I didn't know Helen well but she was one hell of a woman, I can tell you that. She set my Mom free. Free to live - free to kill.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Sat, 10 Jul 2021 22:36 UTC

On Saturday, July 10, 2021 at 4:14:22 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> "Walking around with shit in your pants 24/7 can make one immune to the smell that premeates. Sadly the same can't be said for those around her. I'm sure the same situation exists for Miss Keller. You are a very kind person to not embarrass her for her condition."
>
>
> I was was joking about having sex with Helen Keller. Truth is, Helen was my mother's sister - same mother, different fathers. Like Helen my mother was handicapped. She was mentally ill. Most of her young adult life was spent in a variety of institutions for the criminally insane. She and Helen did not get along.
>
> Later after Helen became famous many in our family were worried Helen's fame might take my mother's already fragile mind and splinter it to bits. Funny thing though, it had the opposite effect. In occasional lucid states my mother was able to comprehend the positive impact Helen had on people's lives. My mother grew to admire and love Helen. It was a cathartic moment. In no time she became instantly cured - no longer cowering in the shadows, no longer afraid to live life on her own terms - at long last she was able to break out of her shell of isolation and loneliness to do what she had had wanted inwardly to do for years - she went out beyond the nuthouse walls and killed the first person she saw. I didn't know Helen well but she was one hell of a woman, I can tell you that. She set my Mom free. Free to live - free to kill.

The Who Band did gang fuck Helen. Ok not the real one but a girl who was deaf dumb blind. It gave them inspiration. You would not understand it. You are a loser. The Who are winners.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Date: Sat, 10 Jul 2021 17:53:18 -0700 (PDT)
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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Sun, 11 Jul 2021 00:53 UTC

> The Who Band did gang fuck Helen. Ok not the real one but a girl who was deaf dumb blind. It gave them inspiration. You would not understand it. You are a loser. The Who are winners.

I don't mind being called a loser because I am a loser and proud of it. But I don't like The Who being called winners - especially not at my expense. A real winner is someone who knows he is a loser and is willing to admit it. Other than that there are no winners or losers, just a bunch of people waiting to die in a variety of ways too many to mention.

Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Sun, 11 Jul 2021 04:07 UTC

On Saturday, July 10, 2021 at 8:53:19 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > The Who Band did gang fuck Helen. Ok not the real one but a girl who was deaf dumb blind. It gave them inspiration. You would not understand it. You are a loser. The Who are winners.
> I don't mind being called a loser because I am a loser and proud of it. But I don't like The Who being called winners - especially not at my expense.. A real winner is someone who knows he is a loser and is willing to admit it. Other than that there are no winners or losers, just a bunch of people waiting to die in a variety of ways too many to mention.

I take back the loser and raise you a never has.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: jazeev1...@gmail.com (Thomas Joseph)
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 by: Thomas Joseph - Mon, 12 Jul 2021 20:51 UTC

> I take back the loser and raise you a never has.

So you're saying I'm a never was an a never will be, is that it? I agree. And that's the way I want it. I dig the anonymity. I had many chances for fame but turned away from all of them. A part of me wanted it, yes - but overall I knew it was not a good thing for me. I knew becoming famous might turn me into an asshole which would not be a good thing for other people.. And as you are already aware, I care more about other people than I do for myself. It's just the way I've always been. But my time is coming. Soon. Soon for just once in my life I want to know what it's like to do something for myself alone. I want some ME time. I need some ME time. Is that asking too much?

Well, is it punk? Answer ME.

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Subject: Re: How to cook a cat with your coffee maker
From: OllieNor...@aol.com (OllieNorthie@aol.com)
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 by: OllieNorthie@aol.com - Tue, 13 Jul 2021 04:00 UTC

On Monday, July 12, 2021 at 4:51:47 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I take back the loser and raise you a never has.
> So you're saying I'm a never was an a never will be, is that it? I agree. And that's the way I want it. I dig the anonymity. I had many chances for fame but turned away from all of them. A part of me wanted it, yes - but overall I knew it was not a good thing for me. I knew becoming famous might turn me into an asshole which would not be a good thing for other people. And as you are already aware, I care more about other people than I do for myself. It's just the way I've always been. But my time is coming. Soon. Soon for just once in my life I want to know what it's like to do something for myself alone. I want some ME time. I need some ME time. Is that asking too much?
>
> Well, is it punk? Answer ME.

Been watching too much ME TV. Try watching US TV and be less selfish.
I use to want to be rich and famous, Then rich and anonymous. Now I want to be left alone Garbo style.


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